You bitch about annoying commercials in your den. I do it online. I'm lucky enough to watch TV for a living, which means I often have to watch it live. I don't get to FF over the commercials. There is snark ahead. You've been warned.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Guest post from my dad: Digitized Charles Schwab People Freak Me Out!

Like me, my dad watches quite a bit of television. Like me, he has a lot of complaints about stupid commercials. He also has some serious issues with clowns. Long story. Anyway, here is Dad's take on the digitized people in the Charles Schwab commercials. For the record, they freak me out too. Disclaimer: The political leanings of Super Dad are his own and not the opinions of the owner of this blog. :)

Another commercial series I don’t like are the one from Charles Schwab – the ones where digitized human characters talk about investing.

First, is there a shortage of real human beings that necessitates the use of digitized humans? If so, why was I not made aware of this shortage? Surely under Obama there must be at least a dozen federal agencies where hundreds of employees are tasked with issuing a report when a human shortage occurs. Has such a report been issued? I think not.

Another issue is why would anyone take investment advice from make-believe people? Wouldn’t you think that financial decisions would warrant input from real people? I would think that even stupid real people would be preferable to smart sounding make-believe people? I mean, I love Mickey Mouse and his Mouseketeer buddies, but I would not consider their thoughts into any of my critical decisions.

He said Mickey Mouse. There was no way I was passing up a chance to use this picture.

I’m also concerned that the increasing appearances of these make-believe people could be an indication of something even more troubling. I’m thinking of Invasion of the Body Snatchers. You may think that this was just a movie where aliens slowly replaced humans with lookalikes, but it may be more than just a movie! In fact, I think I may have seen one of these alien replacements a few days ago in the gym. This supposed women had certain body parts that seemed to defy the natural laws of movement and gravity as she ran on a treadmill. I will task myself with further observations in this area to see if I can uncover a larger conspiracy.

This is not to even mention that some of these digitized characters look like “clowns”, and you know how I feel about clowns.


  1. Your dad cracks me for Mickey Mouse, my husband, our dog, and I won an online contest ($100.00 gift cert.) for a picture of us dressed as Mickey (Ron), A.J.(our dog) also dressed as Mickey, and myself (dressed as Minnie)...

  2. I'm right there with you on clowns, sir.

    For my own five bucks (my opinions cost more than 0.02), allow me to add that even these investment firm commercials supposedly aiming to make investment "accessible" are talking to people who have WAAAY more money than I think I'm ever going to see in this lifetime.